Are You Uncomfortable With Success?
Having high expectations for yourself raises your success ceiling. With a higher ceiling, you’ve created the possibility of greater levels of success. But are you comfortable with success? That might seem like an odd question, but a hidden fear of success can be the ultimate form of self-sabotage.
Many people are uncomfortable with the prospect of success. It seems hard to believe but it’s true. Who wouldn’t want to be more successful?
Failure might not be ideal, but it can be more comfortable than the possibility of something more. Eliminating your fear of success could be all you need to do to take your life to the next level. You may not even be aware that the thought of success makes you uncomfortable.
Consider these facts and strategies about success to become more comfortable with choosing success as a way of life:
Fear of success can manifest itself in different ways
Procrastination, self-sabotage, and an inability to concentrate on important tasks are signs of discomfort with success. Do you suddenly feel tired when performing a task that could take your career to the next level? These are signs that your unconscious is derailing your efforts.
Notice signs of self-sabotage in your work and relationships. Ask yourself why you engage in those behaviors. Look at your past objectively. Are you unconsciously modeling the behavior of an unsupportive role model?
Discovering and understanding the roots of your discomfort with success can help you break out of the patterns that hold you back. Ask yourself why you fear failure or success. Look at how those attitudes manifest themselves in your life now.
Interrogate negative beliefs.
What are negative beliefs? Negative beliefs are messages from your self-doubters that you have been internalizing all of your life. They might sound like any one of these: "You'll never make it," "The only reason you've been successful thus far is because of luck or coincidence," or "It's too late to start over now."
Sound familiar?
Make a list of your negative beliefs regarding success. Question them.
How do you know this belief is true?
When did this belief originate?
What are a few counterexamples to this belief?
What is this belief costing you?
“Your conscious mind is the goal-setter and your unconscious mind is the goal-getter. When the two are not aligned, you will constantly undermine your success.”
Success is more complex than failure.
It’s can seem easier to deal with your life as it is than to become successful. The more successful you become, the more visible you become. You’re more exposed to criticism. You have more responsibility. You may have to live with more pressure.
Remind yourself that you’ll have access to more resources if you’re successful. An excess of resources results in more comfort. When you have plenty of resources, even challenges become an opportunity for success.
You might worry about having to become a different person.
The key to success isn't finding out who you are; it's creating yourself in alignment with your desire for change.
Success requires change, but you can still be the same person. Someone that wants to lose weight will have to change their eating and exercise habits, but they are fundamentally the same person. You'll discover something about yourself every time you rise above your previous limits.
Have a vision of success that appeals to you.
Are you afraid that massive success will result in a loss of free time?
Build a vision of success that allows you to work on the beach for a few hours each day with your laptop.
Success won’t happen if your picture of success is unappealing.
What is your ideal version of success?
What will you see, hear, or feel when you have it?
List the advantages of success.
Make a personal list that excites you. Consider all the advantages that success can bring: influence, money, social status, comfort, contribution, and so on.
Write out the advantages of success in your mind. Imagine them vividly.
Enjoy the process.
Success can seem like a lot of work. If you view the work as misery, no success will be attractive enough to motivate you. Find a way to enjoy the process of becoming successful. You might choose to value what you’ll learn or the people you meet along the way. Sometimes, it’s just the adventure of finding the right path.
It feels counterintuitive that anyone would fear success. However, this is one of the primary reasons everyone isn’t more successful.
Avoid underestimating how much your negative impressions of success can sabotage your future.
Build a vision of success that motivates you to be successful.
Eliminate the negative.
Question your current beliefs.
And enjoy the success you deserve.
Along with the fear of success, the fear of failure is one of the most common fears. Luckily, you’ll discover how to overcome limiting beliefs when you become a certified NLP Practitioner!
Getting Started
● Make a list of the times you’ve sabotaged yourself in the past. Include your education, career, relationships, and finances. Ask yourself why you were self-sabotaging.
● Create a vision for a successful life. Throw caution to the wind and don’t worry about being practical. Keep making alterations until it’s as positive and exciting as you can stand. Write it down.
